Sister Sarah of Wasilla, Alaska….Quitter, Liar, Political Supergenius (Updated With Some Genuine Lisa Ann Props From Tina Fey)
Asshattery, F*ck The Republicants, The Sarah Palin Files, Wild Wacky Wingnuttery January 8th, 2010
[Updated: scroll to bottom.]
You know, everyone is talking about the absolute dire threat that Sarah Palin — former Alaska Governor and former VPOTUS nominee — brings to the election campaign.
You know…the adoring crowds of Teabaggers just hoping to jump her bones….errrrrrrr…….catapult her into the White House on the strength of her right-wing convictions and spunky “never say die” attitude.
And of course, her desire to speak the truth about the issues of the day is….shall we say, unrivaled.
Of course, her truth is just a wee bit different from the actual reality, but isn’t that par for the course for the usual brand of wingnutter Republicans recently??
This week, the former half-term governor/nearly landslide loser in the 2008 election kicked off the publicity tour of her much awaited book of memoirs of said campaign, titled Going Rogue; which for some strange reason made it up to #1 on Amazon.com’s bookseller list. In it, she basically blames the campaign staff of her mentor and running mate, Arizona Senator John McCain, for not using her properly in the ‘08 campaign, and not allowing her to show herself as the conservative asset that would have blown Barack Obama back to Illinois (or Hawaii, or Kenya, or to his radical Islamic socialist madrassa school in Indonesia, I guess) if only given the leeway and the freedom. She also uses the book to make the usual wingnutty statements about the evil “socialist”/”communist”/”big government” agenda set upon the American people by Prez O and the Democrats; and to defend her record as governor of Alaska against critics who dared level the charge of “quitter” at her.
In order to maximize the sales of her book (and to avoid palling around in alien liberal territory where she might have to face actual criticism), she decided to go on friendly outlets like Fixed Noise (mostly Sean Hannity’s show) and not quite so friendly, but vital for book sales venues like Oprah Winfrey’s show…the fact that Oprah announced the next day that she was shutting her show down after the 2009-2010 season was just mere coincidynk…or perhaps Palinitis is becoming as virulent as the H1N1 Swine Flu virus.
Probably a good thing for ex-Gov. Palin, too….considering that her book has come under considerable fire for its consistent…shall we say….fudging of the facts. Or, to put it more directly, it’s repeated and consistent knack for spawning repeated cries of Repub Congressman Addison “Joe” Wilson’s pointed phrase: “You LIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!!!”
Plenty of folk have come forth to fact-check Going Rogue….The Huffington Post website did a slideshow featuring a mere 18 choice whoppers that they found — among which were the claims that Palin was only told right before McCain’s concession speech on Election Day that she wouldn’t be allowed to speak (in fact, she was told several times that day); that the McCain folk had attempted to put the bill on her vetting on her (in fact, they used her legal defense fund), and that she was intimately involved in the legal wrangling over the Exxon Valdez oil spill, even taking credit for the final compensation (the actual Supreme Court decision radically reducing Exxon’s damage claims, and her own public statements back then expressing “disappointment” at the ruling back then, nonwithstanding). In fact, the lead attoney for the plaintiffs in that case had two choice words for Palin’s accounting of the case: “cockamanie bullshit”.
And then, there are the lies chronicled by Keith Olbermann that clearly make you marvel at her capabilities:
Countdown with Keith Olbermann (MSNBC) 11/18/09 segment on the continuing lies of Sarah Palin (via YouTube)
Now, all this probably wouldn’t matter much to Palin’s diehard fans, who would normally flip off such criticism as such liberal media hateration.After all, their queen wouldn’t slight them in any way, right??
Actually, she would. Ask the folks in Noblesville, Indiana.
Yesterday, some of Nobelsville’s finest citizen wingnuts lined up and waited in the cold and the rain for more than nine hours for Palin’s book tour to hit their fair town. The idea was that they would purchase a copy of her book, then use the receipt to finangle their way to Palin for a signed autograph.
It would have worked well, too, had Palin decided to stay to the end….problem was, for whatever reason she only got as far as the “N’s” before she decided that enough was enough, and headed back into the comfort of her tour bus. Which made for some pretty angry people on the outside looking in.
Needless to say, certain media folks were quick to take advantage of this rift in the Palin fan continun.
Countdown with Keith Olbermann (MSNBC, Lawrence O’Donnell guesthosting): 11/20/09 segment on Sarah Palin’s grand book tour FAIL in Noblesville, IN (via YouTube)
Question for Rush Limbaugh: Still think that she’s such a brilliant political analyst??
I’ll say it again: Lisa Ann (Warning, adult link, very NSFW) is more qualified for a VP slot than Caribou Quitter Spice ever will be. And more intelligent. And sexier. She should get the Newsweek cover….on general principles.
I did say that she was sexier, too….right??
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Update: Guess who else thinks that Lisa Ann should get more props for showing Sarah Palin who has brains?? None other than…Tina Fey, whose spoofing of Palin for Saturday Night Live has earned her fame and fortune. Spaketh Ms. Fey, hosting the Ad Council’s annual dinner, as quoted by The Huffington Post:
“Mrs. Palin and I continue to have so much in common,” she said. “They recently made a porn movie about Sarah and then this same porn actress, Lisa Ann, played me in a parody of ‘30 Rock’ … And weirdly of the three of us, Lisa Ann knows the most about foreign policy.”
Scary thing about that comment?? It may just be is just plain damn true.
Quite naturally, Lisa Ann had a quick response to the props from Tina Fey. Posted today (November 22nd) at her Twitter page (@thereallisaann):
Thank you Tina Fey!! U r amazing. Also thank u sarah palin, for just being you!! Hahahahr
That “porn movie” is now a porn series, which Lisa Ann, along with HUSTLER, who produced the “Naylin’ Paylin” series, is now offering as a special box set at her official website, TheLisaAnn.com (Warning, the link is definitely NSFW). If you are into such things, check them out, and feel free to join her site, too.
Tags: Lisa Ann's Nailin' Paylin, Porn Chicks Rule, Quitter Spice, Sister Sarah of Wasilla
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